So often well-meaning people say to students, “Oh you
will love college! It will be the best time of your life!” Sometimes, that
statement is true. Much of the time it is not. For me, it was a fantastic
period in my life. I so enjoyed being involved in music and musical theater
(music major) and making life-long friendships. I had wonderful and encouraging
professors who really cared about helping me become a better musician and
person. I had some great opportunities – travelling with the college choir,
going on professional trips to regional and even national music conventions,
being involved in campus ministries, leading a public speaking lab class,
performing in and attending numerous outstanding musical performances, as well
as many other very enjoyable and valuable experiences. But was it the “best
time in my life?” Hardly.
Probably most of the time, college isn’t the “best time”
of a student’s life, and that is ok, even desirable. Sometimes college is a
“means to an end:” a necessary training period for reaching a person’s goals
and achieving their dreams. I think that at least occasionally, students may
feel some pressure to try to make college the highlight of their life, and when
you think about it, if college is the best time of someone’s life, what does
that say for the next 50-70 years?
College provides many wonderful opportunities. Obviously,
the learning, the training, the skills should be foremost the “best” thing
about college, as those things are what will propel a student toward a
rewarding, fulfilling career. But to make the college experience the best it
can be, it is important to get involved in something – a club, an organization,
an activity, a cause. This will help you meet people with whom you probably
have at least one common interest. It is important to make connections with
people, and this will only happen by interacting through your classes, study
groups, the aforementioned activities, or some type of experience that will
help you get out among people. Sometimes this is a scary “stretch” for students.
It may force you out of your comfort zone, but that is good because it is
really important to make connections with others. It is necessary. Research
shows this time and time again.
If and when college does become stressful, and at some point
it is likely to be when, don’t suffer through the stress alone. Reach out. Ask
for help if you are having trouble in a class. Ask for help if you are lonely
or homesick. Ask for help if you are feeling overwhelmed or helpless in any
way. There are usually counselors, advisors, professors, as well as resident
advisors and directors who can listen and help or at least point you toward
someone who can. Talk with friends, too. Those connections and friends you make
from interactions in classes and activities probably are or will be feeling the
same way, and often just venting to someone can really help cleanse the soul.
Exercise is also a very good way of relieving stress. Something as simple as a
walk – alone or with a friend, silently or with your favorite music in your
ears – can also be very helpful.
Most of all, don’t ever give up! Everything worthwhile
takes some hard work and perseverance. You won’t regret sticking with your
education; I am certain of that. Whether or not college is the “best time of
your life,” it can be a very good time in your life, and it is definitely a
necessary time to achieve the skills and training you will need to reach your
career goals. In actuality, I hope it isn’t the BEST time in your life. I hope
that it is, overall, a good experience, and I hope that your BEST times are yet
to come!
Mary Joan - ICAN Sioux City & Orange City Centers
